What do you do when someone you love hurts you?

I have been pondering this topic heavily the last few days. I believe everyone crosses over this subject several times in their lives. Some quickly move on, others are haunted by it for the rest of their lives. What do we do when someone we are close to & whom we love dearly hurts us beyond our control? 

This is an age old question. The first thing that comes to my mind is forgiveness. Then I think, "But how?". Christ came on this earth, not only to bring about eternal life and give us the ability to live with our Heavenly Father again, but to also be our universal example on how to live our lives. But here is the secret, we will ALWAYS come up short. Always. That is the whole point. We have to strive and do everything in our limited power and ability to BE LIKE CHRIST. Once we do that, Christ will always take care of the rest. He will "pick up our slack". He will never fail us. 

My first "mortal" minded thought was anger. To stay angry. I still have those thoughts. I go back and forth constantly. Struggling between my natural instinctive thoughts of anger and deeply hurt feelings, and my spiritual "Be Like Christ" thoughts that have been placed into my heart and soul throughout my life. 

My Mom told me, that forgiveness is for the person that is forgiving and not the one being forgiven. 

I sat and thought about that for a second. It makes sense, because it is a burden lifted from your worn out shoulders that can only carry so much. 

I am only 21. But I feel like I have had to do a lot of self-evaluating, forgiving of others, and forgiving myself, especially the last 3 to 4 years. It's always the one's closest to you, that sometimes, you have the hardest time forgiving. Why is that? I'm not really sure. Maybe it is because you hold a standard of trust, or what have you, and when that is broken, it is life altering. It changes who you are permanently. Think about it, you go through a process of forgiveness between you and Christ. It causes you to re-evaluate things. It causes you to deeply think about who are you, who the person you are working on forgiving is, and how you choose to be effected by the circumstance. That is what life is all about. Growing up, changing into someone who you choose to be. 

We may not have a choice in who hurts us or what struggles we endure, but we in fact choose how we learn and react from them. 

I have to remind myself constantly of that. The Lord wants us to forgive those who wrong us, but I also believe we need to learn from those forgiving experiences. Meaning, don't put yourself in that position of vulnerability a second time, or third, or however long it takes to realize that. Never stop being kind, that is not what I am saying. But you have an obligation to protect yourself from hurtful feelings and wrongdoings to the best of your ability. 

So back to the question, "What do you do when someone you love hurts you?" I think my answer is to turn to Christ, consistently. Ask him. Allow yourself time to heal. Allow him to be there with you along the way. That way when you are ready to forgive, you will be able to fully receive the blessings that forgiveness brings. 

With Love, 

~Katie B.  

Who Am I?

I feel like I learn something about myself after each trial, at the end of each semester, each religious experience, (attending church, serving others, going through trials, etc).

I feel like I have changed immensely these last two years. Every trial I have gone through, I KNOW has made me stronger, for my personal benefit, for my marriage, and for friends and family.

Kyle and I went to his academic advisement appointment last week. We were both very nervous because with us, it is always something, whether it is self inflicted or just completely out of the blue. We have been through some doosies let me tell you! His former advisor has been promoted to another position within the University, so he had a brand new advisor. So you can understand our worries!

We went in there nervous, and came out on cloud 9. She gave Kyle the green light to graduate at the end of Spring Semester 2014. We didn't say anything to each other at first, soaking in the information we just received. We went out to lunch afterwards and I had a few thoughts come into my mind:

When we came to Utah, my thoughts and feelings were "I just need to get away" mostly in regards to my family. I needed my space and needed to find my footing of who I was, who WE were as husband and wife, as a family. I came to realize that my family is what I missed the most while out here in the West. I love BYU, I love UVU, I love the historical value and beauty of Utah. The history of the saints, their struggles, their triumphs. It gives me a perspective of how I should live my life, how I should treat the luxuries of the Book of Mormon, Institute, Freedom of Religion, something the saints died for, with respect and not take them for granted.

I said, "Kyle, I feel like we have been through so much, all BEFORE you got your Bachelors degree. I feel like we have taken a path that will make us stronger, not only as future parents, but as children of God. I feel like we have grown and matured a lot. I'm not saying we were immature but there was plenty of room to grow. I've learned that I want my children to have what I had growing up. Close knit aunts and uncles, cousins on both sides. I want that so bad for our kids. I am willing to go to great lengths to make that happen. Family is #1 in our lives, and if we make that our first priority, the Lord will bless us with the things we have long fought for. A job, stability and a beautiful family."

Who am I?
I am a daughter of God. I am someone that is loyal, and a very hard worker. I am willing to do what it takes to get the job done, whatever the costs. I believe in being kind to others, going out of my way to help others in need, whether they want to receive it or not. I believe being "moderate" is a very bad way to be. I believe in standing up for what I believe in whether I am  liked or not. I believe in not being passive.

I KNOW my Redeemer lives, and His Gospel is alive and well on this earth. I KNOW marriage is divinely inspired by the Lord Himself, and I cherish it. I am a strong woman, a strong daughter of God. I KNOW all life on this earth is cherished and should be treated as such.

I look forward to a new chapter in my life. I look forward to Kyle graduating, and him moving on and providing for our family. I appreciate the people rooting for me AND against me in my journey because both helped me to keep going.

Don't allow yourself to get caught up in today's afflictions. I know I have been allowing myself to do that the last few days. I need to "shake it off" and move on. Stand out, stand for the ways of the Gospel. Stand for something, for righteousness.

“Our safety lies in the virtue of our lives. Our strength lies in our righteousness. God has made it clear that if we will not forsake Him, He will not forsake us.”

-Gordon B. Hinckley

~Katie B.

Fall Semester 2013. Home stretch!

I haven't done an "update" post in a while. I thought I'd let my readers know what's going on in my life.

It's mid September and I can smell the fall coming! I am working this semester, the first time since I left Texas over a year ago. It was an adjustment at first, getting up at the crack of dawn, then going to straight to school, but I adjusted eventually.

My favorite part about living in Utah is definitly the fall season! The hot cocoa, the GORGEOUS color change, the mountains in a fall sunset. Being from Texas, the change of color went from green to dead. That's about as gorgeous as it gets. If there is color change, like ACTUAL color change, it doesn't last that long. In Utah it lasts for at least a month, and the color change on the mountain side is a beautiful sight to see!

This semester, I am taking Principles of Animation (such a fun class), Web Essentials, Intro to Technology and Digital Motion Picture Essentials. At the end of this semester, my Technology class will provide me my third science, and I will obtain my Associates of Science Degree. I'm pretty excited. Something to show that I'm halfway down in my arduous major. My major is fun here at UVU, but they are probably about 25 credits more than the average Bachelors Degree because of my Video Gaming concentration. I was going to transfer to BYU, but now that I fell in love with this major, and no where else has it, I just can't seem to part ways with it. It's still up in the air. I feel like the Lord wants me doing this. I was very torn coming into the fall semester, I was taking family classes to prepare for my BYU transfer, but something didn't feel right, so I switched them all back to my Digital Media: Gaming and Animation classes. Time will tell. *Deep Breath* It'll be okay!

I really like my job. It's a very "get in the groove" kind of job, and a lot of responsibilities are on me, which I like, because It allows me to strive to be better each day.

Kyle is almost done! Thank the Lord! He is on his last year. I'm so ready for him to be done I can't even tell you! I'm ready to move on with our lives, at least for him to start making some good money, rather than living from semester to semester. BUT, on the bright side of these few years of struggle, we grew a lot. I mean, a lot. We have grown so much from the time of our first kiss, to our "I do's" to now. We talk about it sometimes, how we've grown and what exactly made us grow up. We talk about our future on a daily basis, from kids, their upbringing, how we want to parent, their education, our finances, where we want to be and what it will take to get there. It's what keeps us going to be honest.

The things I feel like I've improved on is reading our scriptures together. I LOVE reading them with him, because we discuss what we just read, and I feel like I have such a better understanding of the stories and morals being taught to me.

Kyle is doing an internship with the Utah Grizzlies Hockey Team as their Public Relations/Marketing Manger. What a wonderful blessing. It opens doors for the day he graduates and he is doing everything he can to get his foot in the door come graduation day. I'm very blessed to be married to him. Sometimes it gets hard to keep going, but he always reminds me of the great things we have done and the great thing that are in store for us.

And of course BYU Football!! The season has been throwing us around already and we've only played 2 games! The season opener loss to Virgina was a tough one. It depressed me to be honest with you. Going into the Texas game, I was nervous. I expected a loss. I really did. But when we came out and won, it was an amazing feeling! Words cannot describe how awesome of an experience that was for me! BYU will always be in my heart, forever! I'm a diehard, what can I say.

I am constantly being reminded, especially lately, that the Lord has a plan for us. That's not just a cliche, it's fact. The Lord has a path for you, and He knows what we are going to do before it even comes into our minds.We have to humbly keep this in mind. Always. Don't fixate your thoughts on the future to the point where you forget about the present. Go out of your way to help others have a good day. That's what makes MY day great, is when I have the opportunity to help others. If I died today, that's what I would want to be known for, is for helping others. Not for anything else. 

Thanks for your time readers! I hope you all have a great week! Until next time!

~Katie B.

"I Am A Champion And You're Gonna Hear Me Roar!"

Katy Perry released her new single a few weeks ago. I was anxiously waiting the night it was released, both nervous and excited for something new from one of my favorite artists of all time. "Roar" did not disappoint me. It is very inspiring and can apply to any situation!

I don't usually talk about this sort of stuff on this blog, but I just had too. Although Katy Perry and I can disagree on A LOT of things, I love her personality and the music she writes. It captivates me and just puts me in a really good mood. Our personalities are very similar as well, which explains a lot haha. 

How would you apply these lyrics? 

I apply them to school and also to society. Everything I stand for is something that society likes to degrade, or "knock me down". Marriage (especially at a young age), standing for Christ and His Gospel, society is going to hear me roar! And nothing can stop me! "You knocked me down, but I got up, already brushing off the dust.." 

"You hear my voice, you hear that sound. Like thunder, gonna shake the ground." Speak out for what you believe. Do not hide only because the truth is unpopular. Now is this what Katy Perry is saying in her lyrics? No probably not, but I'm taking words and relating them to a special, impowering meaning to me, which is also something YOU can do. 

Anyone that has followed up on her in the news, knows it's about Russel Brand-Ex Husband. 

But it's inspiring nonetheless! 

Speak out people, speak for your believes. Stand up for Christ and His Gospel. You are a champion, and let society hear you ROAR! 

"Don't Worry...Load The Wagon."

Earlier this week I just couldn't sleep. I was troubled by life's curveballs thrown at us earlier in the day and I just couldn't shake it. You want to know something I've noticed? When the 'bumps' in the road come our way, they're all at once. It's as if a bomb is dropped one after another, at least for me. 

My husband had already went to bed and I just could not shake the feeling of worry. 

I felt prompted to go find a talk or read scripture to calm my nerves, it's not like me to let things bother me into the night. I went to lds.org and searched "Worry" hoping to find something relevent. And I found this...http://www.lds.org/broadcasts/-dont-worryload-the-wagon?lang=eng&country=afe

A talk given by Elder Carl B. Cook about not letting anxiety get in the way of moving forward in faith. 

fmaonline.net

I read through this talk, jotting down quotes that stuck out at me, and begun to slowly calm down. I was still worried of the roadblocks put in my path, but there was one word that really stuck out to me. Action.

abundancetapestry.com

My mind was fixated on the word. Elder Cook emphasises the teachings of Joseph Smith regarding action and connecting it to the work of the Gospel and Christ's teachings. I felt comfort in this because I knew that I will exhaust all options in making things right and put forth effort to work out my troubles, that the Lord would take care of the rest. 

The title of this post (and the title of the talk) is titled after a phrase Elder Cook's Grandmother used to say. "Don't worry about the mules going blind...just load the wagon." He interpreted this into his own words. "Don't let your anxiety about the future stop you from moving forward in faith." Very well put Elder Cook. 

quiltersclubofamerica.com

 I have another challenge for my readers. If any of you read my previous posts, my "5 Ways To Be Happy" post last year, I talk about writing in a journal. How about having a separate journal for your spiritual thoughts? Weird I know, but hear me out. I have a journal for my general thoughts (spiritual as well) but I also have a small journal that I take to church with me, or when I read scriptures with my hubby. It helps gather your thoughts on what you just read or heard. It's a great tool to remember what you learned spiritually and it helps you grow. 

Thanks for tuning in to today's post! Until next time! 

~Katie B. 

The Gay Marriage Ruling and Abortion: Where government is God?

So many things to think about. So many things are going through my mind. I wanted to address these huge monumental decisions that have been made this past week. I will begin with acknowledging my heavy burdened heart. 

We all have opinions, and this blog is about mine. If any readers don't like my stance or views, I will not apologize. I commend any person for standing firm in their beliefs, regardless of political views and differences that we may have. Standing firm gives you respect in my book. Truthfully, there are very few people in my friends list that actually care and stay firm and not "go with the flow" and just do what's popular. I commend them for that. 

According to the constitution of the United States, us Christians have to stop and ask ourselves, why can't they be married. Anything where the government is involved turns corrupt and lacks moral standing. So this was just a matter of time in reality. On the other hand, politics used to be fighting for your moral standings and beliefs, not this "politically correct" nonsense that half the time doesn't make any sense. 

I put Christ and His gospel into my everyday life. Yes, even in my politics. You can say that's wrong, but I feel that it is right. This country was founded on christian beliefs and was only made possible by His grace and protection. We are the chosen country of this earth. I firmly believe that. Because I put Him in my everyday decisions, I was very saddened by the decision to throw out a major part of The Defense of Marriage Act. Like I said earlier though, it was bound to happen when government is involved in anything so divine. Marriage is a blessing provided by God Himself. Let's break down the institution of marriage. 

A man and woman, so different in every way shape and form, come together as one. Isn't that just beautiful? Two totally different people, of different minds, different bodies, different spirits come together. They are bound together by God (NOT the government....I wish) for and in all things. They come together body and soul and create another life out of their love for themselves, each other, and of God. Again, beautiful. Now, I know not all couples can have children, and yes it is sad. BUT with that being said, He will bless you and fulfill your life in other ways. A way that is different to every couple. 

This is something that I stand for, and will continue to do so into the eternities. I strongly believe that the definition of marriage was given by God and not the government. Now because we live in a world where our government oversteps their boundaries on a daily basis (not what our forefathers intended!!) of course it will be defined and change over time. Of course it will. It makes perfect sense. When we take God out of the picture, the everlasting foundation called "the truth" changes. 

What I don't understand from some christians is when they say "God hates gays" or things like that. That couldn't  be further from the truth. To be honest, that is horrible to say to anyone! I would never bully or be hateful to anyone. Everyone that knows me, knows that this is true. Standing up for what you believe in and being firm in your foundations is completely different then being hateful and spiteful and just plain nasty. 

Now on to the abortion segment.

Gosh, I don't even know where to start. It breaks my heart. It truly does. It is NOT a women's health issue. It really isn't, the "health" issue, is a rare occasion. I would go around saying "Abortion is NOT okay...EXCEPT....." Then I saw this 'analogy' that really made me stop and think. 

Do you think my older sister looked at her daughter as a "women's health right" or a "women's health issue" 

This is what people are viewing as "a burden" and denying life to many wonderful human beings. If this beautiful girl wasn't in my life I wouldn't know what to do! She is the closest thing I have to a child right now and Kyle and I enjoy just being with her every second we get! 

Here is a fact. People choose (mostly) to have sex. They make the choice to potentially create another life. Denying life is a huge mistake for any person to make. Have you ever asked a woman, preferably a single mom if she wished she aborted her child? I'm sure you are also going to meet someone who wishes they haven't. 

The institution of marriage and children are two of God's most precious gifts. Let us protect these gifts and enjoy all the wonderful things in this world. God bless! 

~Katie B. 

What's Missing?

It has been a while since I've written a post on this blog. A while for me anyways. It was a very rough end to the semester. I was studying every extra minute I had for my 8 credit hour math course that I wasn't sure I was going to pass. The thought of failing a class just mortified me, especially with how hard I work just to enroll at the beginning of every semester. Wondering about money for books, travel schedules between Kyle and I, it's a stress, but it's all worth it.

I think we can start to see the light at the end of a long looong tunnel...

The time came for final exams, I had A's in all my classes except for this class that should have a warning label attached to it before you confirm registration: WARNING: Could cause immense stress and can imitate the feelings of being in Hell.

Yeah, this is about how I felt last semester. 

Everyone told me I was crazy to take that class, but I wanted to be done with it once and for all. Utah has different requirements than Texas does, and those requirements require taking a lot more math than wanted. I just wanted to be done with it.

I took that exam, and it was difficult. VERY difficult. I knew I didn't pass and was preparing myself to take it this summer and working hard to keep my head and emotions held high. I checked my grade later that night, and lo and behold, I passed. I literally got down on my knees and thanked God because I knew that it was a miracle. My teacher had dropped my lowest quiz grade which allowed me to pass the class. I considered this a blessing from God.

On top of that blessing, Kyle had gotten good grades as well as a new better paying job with UVU. This job will also bring half tuition IN STATE which amounts to around 2000 for a whole semester. Great blessings were being brought upon us.

It is so easy to forget the many blessing we receive in life. I noticed a change in my life once the abundance of blessings were given. I slacked off. I shirked my duties that I was constantly on top of during the semester. Such as Visiting Teaching, staying for all 3 hours for church etc. I noticed a change in me. In my attitude. I started feeling depressed, worried about other's gossip that I was hearing about me (which didn't bother me at all until I started slacking off). Why was I feeling this way? What was missing?

Christ. Christ was missing. Although He is always with me in my endeavours, I was missing Him and ignoring promptings from the Holy Ghost. I went to church and felt so much better. It was like having a headache and the ibuprofen working immediately. I felt empowered, and I felt right.

Why did I slack off when I clearly received blessings for my diligence?

Good question. The only honest answer is because I got lazy. Which is normal to do. But because I am endowed, I feel that I am held to a higher standard. Being spiritually fed is just as essential as being fed physically.

It is going to be a busy summer with summer school, Kyle working a ton, but it also going to be fun and used to the fullest.

We are human. That's the problem. We make mistakes but we are also all born with the Light of Christ inside of us. That is our own guide of right and wrong, eventually leading to peace.

A Women Praying in General Conference

General Conference was amazing as usual. I loved all of the talks given. I have taken General Conference for granted most of my life. It wasn't serious until I met Kyle when I started to take it seriously and listen to the counsel given by the Lords appointed. When I introduced him to the church, I told him about the famous semiannual event, and he thought it was the coolest thing.  I then began to change my viewpoint about it, and listened to the wise words of our General Authorities.

I had the privilege to attend the Saturday morning session of the 183rd General Conference. I was so excited and felt the spirit the whole drive there! The talks were all amazing, but the one that spoke to me the most was Sister Dalton's talk on women and their virtue. She quoted "We are daughters of our Heavenly Father, who loves us and we love Him." from the Young Women's theme. From the time I was 12, this has been stuck in my head and I have NEVER felt oppressed by men or unequal in the eyes of God. As soon as conference was finished, a women behind me said, "Well there it is! The first woman to pray in a General Conference. My life is complete!" Yes, that is verbatim. I immediately became discouraged. Why would you focus on just that, out of all the wonderful talks and words of wisdom that were just given to you? My favorite quote that morning was this. "Our daily contributions of nurturing, teaching and care-giving and caring for others may seem mundane, diminished, difficult and demeaning at times. And yet, as we remember that first line in the Young Women theme, 'We are daughters of our Heavenly Father who loves us...' it will make all the difference in our relationships and our responses." -Sister Dalton

Some people in the church are making a huge deal out of the fact that a woman prayed in conference. To be honest, as a woman, I don't understand it. Why does the gender of a benediction or invocation matter?  Isn't it the words within the prayer that count? I think Sister Dalton put a woman's value very well in the following quote. "We must never lose sight of the strength of the women. It is mothers who most directly effect the lives of their children. It is mothers who nurture them and bring them up in the ways of the Lord. Their influence is paramount. They are the creators of life. They are the nurturers of children. They are the teachers of young women. They are our indispensable companions. They are our co-workers in building the kingdom of God. How great is their role, how marvelous their contribution." I feel empowered by this statement. 

Why must we focus on the gender of a benediction rather than the wisdom from witnesses of Christ? Because some of us are seeking equality from the wrong source. Some woman are seeking acceptance or equality from man rather than God. I think Elder Cook summed this up in one simple statement. "For those who reject God, there is no peace." Instead of wanting to be equal to man in the eyes of God, they throw God out of the equation. The majority of the uproar are coming from women within the church. So let us break this down. 

                          

If women seek equality from men, they will never be satisfied. That is a promise. Why? Because they do not give it. How can they? What can they honestly do? They do not have the power to comfort you in the ways God can. Equality comes from God. God see's us all, men and women, equally. I have a testimony of this. I firmly believe that something as good as a prayer can be perverted by the contentious spirit of Satan. Satan's spirit has turned this (for some) into a power struggle. Something as holy as a prayer. I encourage those who struggle with this feeling of oppression to turn to the Lord and not to man. Turn to Him and He will comfort in the ways you need. 

I have felt nothing but loved and blessed being a woman in this church. Being a wife in His holy bond of marriage. Preparing to be a mother. These are blessings that I am privileged to obtain. Let us not focus on something as simple as the gender of a benediction/invocation. Let us focus on the message within the prayer and more importantly on the message  of the talks given through divine inspiration!

Al Fox: Tattooed Mormon : My Response to gossip and judgement

Wow. That is the word that kept going through  my mind when I read this article. Her words were so true it was empowering. Al Fox's article is about her being a new convert to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, (aka Mormon Church) and her new move to Utah. She didn't know why the Lord wanted her there. She took the long journey to the beehive state in search of a new life and following the Lord

It goes on to say how people judged her for her appearances, her tatoos to be exact, that were done before her conversion. She felt hurt, judged, misplaced and overall confused of why the Lord sent her here. She now knows her reason for being here. http://www.deseretnews.com/article/765626083/Al-Fox-Tattooed-Mormon.html?pg=1  

I was just overwhelmed at how personal and real this post was. I feel her pain in a different way. Kyle and I made this journey to Utah because we wanted new and better things. We wanted the spiritual aspect of Utah. I wanted BYU. I wanted the culture. I am not from Utah, and I wasn't raised in a normal Mormon family home, so I understand where she is coming from not being raised here. Utah Mormon's are different than what I am used to in Texas. We made a risk by jumping here, but it's worked out because we trusted the Lord and that is a fact! 

My favorite part is the way she spoke to those particularly who struggle. To those who were judged, gossiped about, mistreated just because of their decisions in life. I know this all too well. I know in my heart and soul that all the major decisions in my life have been made with the Lord in mind. Getting married civilly,  moving to Utah, being sealed for time and all eternity, being a homemaker with little money, and so on. I have seen the fruition of all these decisions that have been judged by others, and those people know exactly who they are. These decisions come with trials and hardship, but the blessings always overcome them. If this were a year ago, I might have been crying or worrying every second what these people think about me and my decisions.  Now I have grown so much. The reason is because I turn to the Lord for judgement and NO ONE ELSE. I am much happier because of it. I am sealed to my soul mate because of it. I am taken care of by the Lord and my husband. I am going to school, receiving a great education. My husband is going to school, working very hard, supporting me financially  physically, emotionally and spiritually. I have (for the first time in my life) a residing Priesthood holder in my home. Life is good! 

All these emotions came to me while reading that article. I hope other's read it and feel inspired to share their stories and help others that are going through what you have already conquered  Go and help someone. Talk to a stranger at church, or in class. My new years resolution this year was to not gossip. I have been on the other end, and it was a horrible feeling. I do not want to be like the ones that talked about me when I needed some to talk to. I want to be a light for anyone that needs it. Gossiping and being judgmental drives the spirit away and I highly encourage people to think twice before they engage in such an act. 

I had to take a hard look into what I was doing and how I felt when it was done to me. I repented and am trying to make a difference. Again, think twice before you gossip, especially about family or close friends. 

Be proud of yourself for who you are and what you're doing with the blessings you are given! Use  them to help others! That is truly the work of Christ! 

Why do bad things happen?

This is a universal question asked every day. Why do bad things happen? Or Why me?

I read an article on Familyshare.com and felt inspired to share it. http://familyshare.com/how-to-talk-to-your-spouse-about-god-after-a-loss-of-faith?Itemid=631#.UVSluKPpXTo

The article is about a very faithful man being involved in a softball accident, ending up with 3 months of surgery on his eye. He lost his faith because he became angry with God. He didn't understand why this happened to him with all his devotion towards the Lord. Why did God allow this to happen?

We all know that trials and struggles are a huge part of life. Life is a test to prove our worthiness and devotion to our Savior Jesus Christ. I firmly believe that the worst things happen to the best people. I have seen it been done.

My Nana, she was an amazing person and shaped the person I am today. The last months of her life were spent in a hospital due to someone else's ignorance and lack of patience. When she awoke she spent her time watching church videos, or telling me to pray to the Lord so her leg could heal. She was a selfless women, but went through so many trials, in her childhood and time as an adult. I remember her telling me before she was about to pass on, to pray to my Heavenly Father always and never lose faith. That really stuck with me considering everything she was going through. I will always remember that.

My Grandmother Humble is also a great example. She is a strong women because of the trials she faced in life and teaches me to be the same way. I want both their strength, but the hardest part is remembering how when the time comes.

Again, I believe the worst circumstances happen to the best of people in this world. Why? Because God needs them to be leaders. He needs us to lead those who can't find their way. We need to know what's right and wrong and carry on. Even if it's hard, even if you are the one only standing. Wear your trials like medals, treat them like achievements. If we pity ourselves what good does that do? It not only hurts ourselves, but the loved ones around us. It changes who we are for the worse.

I can attest that the trials that I have been through have made me who I am. I am proud of who I am today. I am proud of my life, my decisions and my faith. I took the hard road willingly by getting married at the age of 18 but I wouldn't take it back for anything. Be proud of your trials. Be proud of your accomplishments. Be proud of yourself.

What is God's Plan for Me?

I've been in deep thought this week. I haven't been able to really focus on my school work because of these things weighing on my mind. What is God's plan for me?


I began to reminiscence on my past and all the things that I have done wrong, the people that I have wronged. I thought about people that were close at one time and why they are now out of my life. I thought about the new friends in my life, how I met my husband, how far we've come. Some of these things I haven't thought about in  years, and it was like an overwhelming flashback. Sometimes I feel like I am just a stepping stone for others to excel and achieve great things God has in store for them.

I went through my "memory box" last night while I was supposed to be studying for my math test. My Mother gave me this box when I was 12 years old. She told me to put special things for only me to look at in this box and to cherish them. At the top of the box was a few notes Kyle has written me here and there, my patriarchal blessing, a birthday card etc. I dug in a little deeper, (more so than I have in a few years) and came across wedding letters from my Father, friends, and family. I pulled out letters from Kyle when we were dating, and of course those made me smile. I then found letters from old friends that I haven't read in at least 4 years, an old make-shift yearbook I made my freshman year of high school, essays I've written, church notes from leaders, friends. I found marching band drill from my first show, a flower my first crush gave me, just so many memories.

I still haven't figured out God's plan for me. I don't know where He wants me to go, and what he wants me to do, but I want to be ready. I know every day is a mission. It's hard to see it that way sometimes, but every day counts for something. Each step forward is a piece of the big puzzle that will eventually come together. I don't how significant I am to peoples lives, or what purpose I serve, but I will continue on with faith and diligence.


~Katie B.

My First Article

Hello loyal followers! Today I am going to re-post my first article in the upcoming magazine LDSgirls.org. I hope you enjoy!

Every girl has a story; a story of triumph, defeat, struggles, and blessings. Each story aims for the happily ever after. The gospel of Jesus Christ provides that storybook ending with the sealing of families here on earth. Love truly is a fairy tale, especially within the temple. The temple marriage would be nothing without love as a foundation. God made a plan for all of us to fall in love. He had a plan when he created the woman. He had this idea for two strangers to fall deeply in love, and care for each other so much they would take part of themselves and create another human being. How amazing is that? On top of all those blessings, He has paved a way for them to be together forever.

 In today’s society, the world portrays marriage as a burden and a weak decision to make in life, especially for women. Society makes marriage appear like a death sentence towards our independence. Little do they know, it is the opposite. It strengthens women and gives us power to overcome all obstacles. I was married at the age of 18. I had no idea that was how things were going to play out in my life. I trusted God's plan. I am now 20 years old, and a sophomore in college, sealed to the man of my dreams; my eternal soul mate. God’s path for us is not always easy. 

I grew up in what the church calls a “part member family”. As a child, my father was not a member of the church but taught me in ways of high moral standards and how a woman should be treated. At the age of 5, my father’s interest in the church grew and he soon developed a testimony of the restored Gospel. It took many years for him to fully convert, body and soul, to the church. Because he believed in the power of the Priesthood, he had the strong desire to be an eternal family and set that goal for all of us to work towards. Through his experience and his example, I feel I am blessed with the ability to see the light of Christ in others. This amazing blessing paved the path to my own love story. 

Although my husband, Kyle, was not a member of the church at the time of our courtship, I saw the light of Christ in his eyes and knew he was the one. I was seventeen years old when I introduced the Gospel to Kyle. I was scared that it would have a negative impact on our relationship, but I continued to hold onto the light I saw in him and trusted God’s plan. To my surprise, Kyle accepted the Gospel and all its fullness and was baptized four months later. The Gospel is the foundation of our relationship. I knew if we held on to the Gospel and the blessings promised by our faithfulness, our goal of being sealed for time and all eternity would be obtained. He proposed, shortly after his acceptance of the Gospel, at the Dallas, TX Temple. We were both excited for our new journey. 

We desired to be married in the temple, but I felt prompted by the Holy Ghost to be married as quickly as possible. Due to the one –year rule for converts, we could not get married in the temple immediately. I was scared about the consequences of this decision, but I trusted God’s plan for me. We made the temple our number one priority after getting married, and here we are now, sealed for time and all eternity. In our journey towards our sealing, we matured spiritually in the Gospel. The promises the Gospel teaches us, the blessings I held when I gave Kyle his first Book of Mormon, the blessings of marriage, and the blessings my father shared, have blossomed and continue to bless our lives. I have been blessed with my own love story. It is different from others but the result is still the same. We will all have a fairy tale if we remain faithful to our covenants and trust God’s plan. God has a happily ever after story for each of His daughters. His only requirement is to endure to the end with faithfulness. 

Katie's 5 Ways of Improving Happiness!

I have just been in the worst moods the last few days! It caused me to have a migraine from you know where! It has also effected my school work and energy to fulfill my obligations as a student! I really sat down last night and discussed it with my husband and we both reached the same conclusion. It is all in my head.

I read an article from KSL, a news station based in Salt Lake City, UT about 5 things we can do to be a happy person. http://www.ksl.com/index.php?sid=23962051&nid=1010&title=5-things-you-can-do-right-now-to-be-happier

I want to ask my readers what they think about this. Are there little things we can do to make our lives easier and more enjoyable? I came up with 5 little things of my own that I can personally work on and I think we all could do as well!

1. Time Management.
This is a HUGE problem for me. People say that they don't have enough time in the day, and that is true for some, but for me it is not! I put things off till last minute or do them at night when I am tired and my attention span lasts as long as a blink of an eye! What can I do to fix that? Well, instead of a weekly planner, maybe an hour by hour planner. Plan what assignments to do in a specific time frame. Plan what time to start dinner, and how long it'll take. And while the dinner is cooking, plan what part of the house you'll clean. I love doing things like this to music, especially to Katy Perry, something spunky, upbeat and fun to listen to while your getting things done! Plan when you'll work out and how long. It's all about time frame! I think this alone will help reduce my stress tenfold!

2. Write In a Journal

This has helped me tremendously. It gives you time to really reflect on your day and the decisions you've made. I like to do it before I go to bed. It relaxes me. It's also a great therapeutic tool. Your journal never judges what you have to say, your inner thoughts, ideas, opinions, struggles and so on. It can come to be your best friend if you let it. I highly encourage my readers to take the time to do this. It doesn't have to be a novel. This goes back to time management, make the time in your day to reflect and how the next day can be better.

3. Take A Walk

Provo Canyon

Sometimes we need a break from everything, especially technology. We all don't realize how much it really dictates our lives on a daily basis. My husband and I used to do this all the time, and I want to start back up again. Especially with us living in the mountain west, the scenery is beautiful and the air is so refreshing. Like the journal, it is a way to reflect on the day, enjoy God's creations, and relieve stress. Go with your friends, spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend, or by yourself. Take your phone only for emergency reasons and keep it in your pocket/purse. I love seeing the mountains with snow on them with a purple/pink dusk sky behind them.

4. Be Attentive to Others

There are many people out there struggling with various problems. Illness, depression, family problems, finances, and much more. I don't know about you but a smile for me goes a long way. Go out of your way to help others. If someone drops their backpack, their papers, items of any kind, even if you are in a hurry, go help them. Talk to strangers when you are waiting in the elevator. Talk to someone in class or at work that you have never bothered to talk to because you don't know them. Stand up for those that need it, even if it isn't popular to do so. Little things like this really make me happy. I enjoy helping others. When you do help someone, do not expect it in return. When you go through life  wanting to give and not recieve life just falls into place. It doesn't mean we won't have problems of our own, but those problems that we do have just work themselves out naturally.

5. Language 
 Last but not least, language. This has more than one meaning. I was told the reason why people use swear words is because the way they sound activate a feeling in our brain that sends a thrill. It's thrilling to use language like that! But in reality a thrill does not last. Swear words are commonly used in describing a frustration and can bring us down, or provoke irritation. I struggle with this. When we use clean language it automatically sets us apart from society and provides a better atmosphere for us to be around. I need to be more attentive of my choice of words and provide myself a better environment on a daily basis. The second definition I am referring to is how we speak. Instead of pointing out the negatives in our lives, speak of happy things that uplift us. I'm not saying be happy 24/7. That can be overkill! But focus on HOW we say things. Focus on the positives in our lives.

http://www.number27.org/wb-language.html

These are the things that I can work on in my life, and I hope it has helped anyone else who struggles with promoting happiness in their lives. Thank you for taking the time to read and have a great weekend!

~Katie B.



 

My Story: Chapter 1: The Beginnings of Eternity

I was thinking, have I told my story to my readers? I am currently working on an article for a brand new magazine called ldsgirls.org about temple marriage and all the prep it takes and how life fits into all that. As I was brainstorming I asked myself have I told my story on my blog? I don't think I have! So here is chapter 1!

 

 

Our first picture as a couple

Let us start on the night of December 30th, 2009. I had just got off of work at Subway and my cousin Tara was in town from Houston. We were planning on going out to IHOP for pancakes and to just chill with Kyle.  But for some reason my Dad wouldn't let me go out. So being the trouble makers that Tara and I were, we still saw Kyle anyway. He came by the house when every one was asleep and we walked around the neighborhood. I had butterflies in my stomach, I knew he wanted to ask me to be his girlfriend, but I was just terrified! We had gone on a formal dates, and several casual hangouts and I really liked him. I had never truly felt this way before. Tara was committed to witness this event no matter what. She came up with a scheme as he was about to leave. "Hey Kyle, we're starving! If I gave you some cash will you go run to Jack in the Box?" Being the sweet man that he was he went.

 

Us at the Botanical Gardens in Fort Worth, TX

While he was gone Tara demanded that I "cut the crap" and kiss him already! "Katie, this is it! You better get out there and lay one on him or I'll force you!" I was horrified by what would happen if I wouldn't, so I agreed. I saw his car down the street. I panicked and went back inside. Tara yelled "KATELYN LEANNE, GET YOUR BUTT (editing this) OUT THERE RIGHT NOW!" She shoved me outside and locked the door to where I couldn't go back in. I slowly walked to the car and he handed me the bag of food. "Thanks, that was really sweet of you." He then replied with a smile, "Anything for you" It was silent. Here I was, hanging over his car window! I knew Tara was watching, and would kill me if nothing happened! He leans in....

 

"Well thanks again" I said nervously. As soon as I stepped away, I instantly regretted it. I wanted to kiss him but I was just to shy! I knew Tara would rip into me. As I watched him drive away, I noticed there was only one burger in the bag. Was this my second chance? Will I blow this one too? I told Tara about this convenient mishap, and all she said was, "OK, I'll be waiting."

 

Botanical Gardens in Fort Worth, TX

He came back and turns out the burger had slipped out of the bag. There we were again. Just me and him, my stomach drops out of nervousness, my breath short. Am I going to blow this? For the second time?  I started to panic again, was I ready for this? I wanted to scream at myself for being so stupid! Just kiss him, I thought. This is it! He just smiled at me. "Goodnight Katie, I'll be a phone call away." As he drove away I couldn't help but smile. I came back inside with my cousin berating me. "Why are you inside?? Well?? ARE YOU HIS GIRLFRIEND OR NOT??". "Not yet" I said. I couldn't help but smile. "Tara, are you even going to eat that burger?" She just laughed. "No, I'm really not that hungry."

 

Later that night, we were texting and talking on the phone. I told him that I really liked him and the fact that he just smiled at me, not expecting anything and understanding how nervous I was meant a lot. I felt like it was in my hands, and in my time. I told him after that moment, I knew I wanted to be with him. He asked me to be his girlfriend later that night. I (obviously) accepted. As funny, or ridiculous as this sounds, that night was the beginning of our journey to eternity.

Building a foundation

Earlier this week I attended an institute class (religious courses) that it's primary focus was to teach how to  build a foundation in relationships on Christ and His Gospel. This goes for anything we do in life. The relationship does not have to be with your wife/husband boyfriend/girlfriend, but for anyone in our lives. Parents, siblings, friends, family, co-workers etc. When we build a foundation on His words and way of life, we will always have something to fall back on. We will have His everlasting love to lift us up in times of trouble and hardships. We can all say these things, but it is a different story to live what we speak. I find this to be so true especially in my marriage.

foundation is built on his investigation of the gospel, and it made my testimony grow ten fold. We have a foundation of Christ

 When I met my husband, I introduced him to the Gospel and said that this was my way of life and who I was. I wanted everything out in the open and I was scared to death that it would run him off. But to my surprise, it didn't. It drew him in closer. It made him curious and fall in love with me even more. That is how our relationship grew. Our in our marriage, not only because of how we met, but because marriage is indeed of God and a wonderful part of his plan for all of us.

I encourage my readers to think about every relationship you have in life and ask yourself what is the foundation of those relationships. Whether it be a co-worker, church member, spouse, parent or child. Was it built upon Christ's love? Was it built on charity? Was it built to help one another? I guarantee if you re-establish that foundation with these qualities, improvements will follow. I took a lot from that class this week and felt the need to share. I hope all of you are having a good week. God Bless.

~Katie B.

Gun Control/Video Games/Society as a whole!

This whole mess is just,...well.. a mess! I have many thoughts on the matter that I want to express.

       First off, the Sandy Hook shootings are just the worst thing that can possibly happen to our society. Innocent children at risk in what is supposed to be one of (if not the most) safest environments other then their homes. As a former child care giver, working in an elementary school, this hits me pretty hard. I can't imagine what I would do in a situation like that. It is such a heart breaking tragedy that unfortunately can not be prevented.

How can we predict an event like this? How can we prevent this from ever being a possibility. That's just it. We can't predict/prevent situations like that. There are already security measures in place that he worked around to even get to those children, I mean what more can you really do? Background checks? Ok, this 'argument' I have a major problem with and here is why. Do you think this man thought about a background check? Do you think this man thought to himself, "I'm registering my weapon, but still planning to kill these innocent children, so they won't suspect a thing!" I'm confident in myself that criminals with the intent to harm don't obviously follow laws in the first place. I'm also fairly confident that going into an elementary school with the intent of killing as many people within  sight is illegal in the state of Connecticut.

What other law can you put in place that will prevent something like this from happening? This is what criminals do, they break the laws that are in place. So you think that the solution to this is to put more laws in place for them to break? Will a background check prevent that? Absolutely not! The second argument that I have been seeing all over Facebook/media is that we should just strip the right all together! At least assault rifles, because the Government knows best right? The only people that will be restricted by that are the people already following  laws. Why would you trust the Government to take away your weapons to leave you defenseless? Is it "In GOVERNMENT we trust" or is it "In GOD we trust"? I don't know about you but I'll put my faith and safety in the hands of God rather than Government. The fact that people trust them period is what is wrong with this society in my opinion.

Recently the Supreme Court ruled a Missouri law unconstitutional for requiring a drug test to be done if receiving welfare because it causes 'stereotyping' among it's recipients. So according to this country it is easier to steal money from hard working taxpayers and coast on the earnings of others than the right to bear arms.

Another issue I see is the blame game towards video games. That bothers me immensely. I have had a passion for video games since I was 3 years old. I have good parents that taught that video games were a good part of life, a tool to expand my imagination. They did not use it as a parenting tool. I was taught the discipline of balance. School first, chores, then came the video games. A reward after all the hard work was finished. Those teachings of responsibility have greatly diminished since then. The society now is all about "reward now, work later."

Granted, video games were different in my child hood then what they are now. Is Call of Duty mindless killing? Yes it is. I cannot argue with that. What about Hollywood? The movies Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Django Unchained? The top of the box offices, and the highest violent/Gorey mainstream movies in the history of Hollywood. That's only ok because it is something society likes and accepts. Contrary to that, playing that game is a choice. It is apart of agency. So is going to the movies. It is the parents responsibility to allow a child to play games like COD, and watch movies like Django Unchained. It is their responsibility to teach "work now, play later" and what is best for their child's development. I am the same age as the shooter, and when I play games such as Call of Duty, it does not want to make me go out and kill innocent people.

It bother's me when "Pro-Gun" advocates blame video games on the Sandy Hook tragedy. That is just as bad as blaming the gun instead of the man behind it. They just want the media to leave them alone, so they go to the next thing on the list. Why don't we all take a step back and place responsibility on the rightful target. The man behind the news headlines, behind the gun. Don't blame the video games, don't blame the guns. All that does is infringe on the rights of others that follow the laws already in place and restricts their liberties.

These are my thoughts on the issues. I am not afraid to stand my ground and speak up for what I believe in. I encourage discussion and debates. Placing laws on already abiding citizens only leads to a divided country.

Sincerely
~Katie B.

It's 2013!

Wow, the year ended with so many great occurrences! Kyle and I were endowed in the Salt Lake City Temple on the 8th of December. We were able to go home and visit family/friends down in Texas for the Christmas holiday! Kyle and I were sealed on the 22nd of December for time and all eternity in the Dallas Texas temple. It was a great day. Also, my Uncle Larry was baptized into the LDS church in December as well. AND last but not least my cousin Karlee was called to serve in the Calgary Canada mission and I was there to see her find out! Great things happened! I guess it was the Lords way of trying to even things out from the hell of the beginning of the year, with the deaths of my Nana and Grandpa and other family struggles that came with all that. It was very difficult dealing with all of that, but I am at peace that it was all a part of God's plan for me.

This semester is a busy one, but I feel so incredibly blessed coming into it. I had many worries coming into the spring semester, but each one of them are slowly being solved by blessings that have been put in our path. Anywhere from finances to school/books. I feel like the Lord is letting me know that he is proud of me, and that I am doing what I am supposed to be doing. My new years resolution this year is grow spiritually ( i have so much by preparing to go to the temple/being sealed/endowed) but I want to build on that now. I want to be disciplined to kneeling for my prayers every night, and read the scriptures not only with Kyle but my own independent study as well. Also, be on top of my studies, and kick that laziness in the butt. The Lord has put me in this position to go to school, and I want to take advantage of that blessing, because being a married student, it truly is a blessing. I'm glad I started out the semester celebrating my 2 year wedding anniversary. It's a good reminder of why we are doing what we're doing, why we are in Utah, and what we want to accomplish by being here. Another new years resolution for myself is to keep negative thoughts to myself and pray for peace for them to leave so I can only focus on the positive aspects of my life. Having negative thoughts towards anyone/anything only hurts the one who has them, and can just get worse from there.

Anyway, I hope everyone had a great Christmas and a happy New Years. I hope we all make new resolutions for life, and just the year of 2013. God Bless you all! Thanks for reading!

~Katie B.